"I love you, and that's what you are getting yourself into."

When I made up my mind, and my heart along with that,
To live not for myself, but yet for God,
somebody said, "Do you know what you are getting yourself into?"
When I finally ironed out all of my priorities,
And asked God to remove the doubt that makes me so unsure of these things,
I ask myself, I ask myself: "Do you know what you are getting yourself into?"

I'm getting into You, because You got to me, in a way words can't describe.
I'm getting into You, because I've got to be. You're essential to survive.
I'm gonna love You with my life.

When He looked at me and said, "I kind of view you as a son"
And for a second our eyes met, and I met that with a question;
"Do You know what You are getting Yourself into?"
I'm getting into You, because You got to me, in a way words can't describe.
I'm getting into You, because I've got to be. You're essential to survive.
I'm gonna love You with my life.

I've been a liar and I'll never amount to the kind of person You deserve to worship You.
You say you will not dwell on what I did, but rather what I do, You say;
"I love you and that's what you are getting yourself into."

You said "I love you and that's what you are getting yourself into."

You Lift me Up.

Waiting for the sunrise, waiting for the day, waiting for a sign that I'm where You want me to be.
I can see the dawn is breaking, I am feeling overtaken with Your Love, with Your Love.
Your Love catches me, so I'm letting go.
Your Love carries me, so I'm letting go.
You really are all that I need.


So I know I could never explain it to anyone... I can't even explain it to myself. But I know what I know, more than anything else in the whole world. I really, really do know that You are there. You are here. You are truer than true; You are truth itself. You are realer than real; You are more real than any reality of this world. You are You; and You will be You, always and forever.

I don't need anyone to try to convince me, and I simply am unable to believe any different. I can feel You, always. And nothing else is more true, more real to me, than the truth, the reality, of who You are.

The Little Green Man.

I'm sure we've all thought about it, when we are either holding a rail walking down a staircase, or pressing the silver button to ask the little green man permission to cross the road, or even turning the handle on a well-used public door, who else has touched this with their hands? Whether we think of such things because of curiosity or for sanitary reasons, we still think of it.

I mean, it's a pretty deep thought, isn't it? Maybe someone famous? Maybe someone on a mission that would, in due time, save the world? Or at the least, change the world in some way. Maybe we'll meet the last person to press that button or hold onto the hand rail. Maybe we'll become the best of friends, maybe we'll fall in love, maybe we already know them, maybe we'll never know who they are. Would we ever really find out?
Many would be doubtful. But that other person's hand has done what your hand has done too. In my head, it seems to make some sort of cosmic sense, that we, us here, alive and breathing; we are all connected. We are all the same. And we can be miles apart from each other, yet impact one another's lives greatly.

Watch that person, next time you are about to push that silver button at an intersection, who presses it before you. They have a story, they have a purpose. They might even be the next person to change the world. And maybe, the person behind you at that intersection, is looking at you and thinking the exact same thing.

"I have always been amazed at the way an ordinary observer lends so much more credence and attaches so much more importance to waking hours and events, than to those occurring in dreams...
...Man is, above all else, the play-thing of his mind."
-Andre Burton.

This is the precious present.

This is the precious present, regardless of what yesterday was like, regardless of what tomorrow may bring. When your inner eyes open, you can find immense beauty hidden within the inconsequential details of daily life. When your inner ears open, you can hear the subtle, lovely music of the universe everywhere you go. When the heart of your heart opens, you can take deep pleasures in the company of the people around you - family, friends, acquaintances or strangers - including those whose characters are less than perfect, just as you are less than perfect.

When you are open to the beauty, the mystery, and the grandeur of ordinary existence, you 'get it' that 'it' has always been beautiful, mysterious and grand - and it always will be. This is the precious present. You are living in the precious present. This is happening right in front of you, all around you. This is right here, this is right now.

Perfect Timing.

So now this year is at its end. If I were in school and had to write some stupid evaluation on this year just passing, I would probably have no short answer to describe how it has been. There was a lot of good, a lot of bad. But I believe it was a really good year over all. Because I can think about the year gone by and feel content, satisfied, pleased.
I know 2012 is gonna be one of those challenging years ahead of me, but I'm starting to feel ready for it. And I guess with only 3 days left of this year, I would hope to be ready.

One big thing I've learned from 2011 has affected me greatly, for the better. I've learned that rather than miss the past and wish I could go back, rather than be afraid of time slipping away, I should embrace time instead. No matter what I do, time will keep going on. Whether we are running ahead of time, obsessing over the future, or running out of breath and lagging behind; time doesn't stop for anybody. I've learned to not just accept that truth, but embrace it. So I'm ready for each day to be what they are. That's all they will ever really be. But it's up to me to make use of what there is in the moment. Time will paint the day, but it's up to me to choose the colours, the style, the subject matter of the whole artwork.
And when you think about who controls time, you know that really, you have nothing to worry about. Because His timing is the ultimate timing, the only real timing. His watch isn't a few seconds off, it's ours that are usually not on time. If He's the one making each day happen in the time it does, then I don't want a single second to be added or taken away. I welcome the new year, and bid farewell to the one that's almost gone. I'm learning how to truly live in the moment; the moment He has given me, the moment for which I am so grateful.

"I've found everything I thought I lost before."

You make sense of who I am.
I come to You in pieces, so You can make me whole.

I think I dreamt of a rainy christmas...

It was pretty cool though, being outside on the patio with my family and friends for a Christmas dinner, while there was a raging thunderstorm swirling all around us. We could barely hear anything other than the rain pouring and the hail throwing itself at the ground, especially under the patio roof that makes everything twice as loud. I liked it though.
And Christmas Eve's eve was very nice, I might say. Simply because I had my head out the window of the car while we were Christmas-light looking, watching the sky for lightning, and basically singing to the stars above us. I slightly forgot about the Christmas lights, but the light show above us was way better.
Even though it has been a rainy, cloudy Christmas and Summer so far, I've enjoyed the strange weather. The hot and sticky humid side of it isn't all that comfortable, but it feels like the end of the year. I guess that's because it is. That's weird.

Today was boxing day and we went sales-shopping in Traralgon. It was pretty much what you'd expect it to be, but I liked it.
Christmas, along with the Eve and the After of Christmas, has been my holiday within a holiday I think. The rest of my 'holidays' for this year is basically cleaning and studying. I don't actually have any plan whatsoever for New Years. I may end up alone, listening to my favourite songs and watching episodes of Community or something. I hope not. I mean, that's what I'm doing now. It's not really something to do to say farewell to the year that has been and hello to the year that is to come.
Or maybe... maybe I could climb up onto my roof, listening to my favourite worship songs and just have a quiet time. That would be wonderful. That will be my solitude plan, if solitude ends up as my circumstance. Let's hope it's not raining on the 31st.
So that's about it. LIT is coming, but if I remember to, I'll probably rant and rave about that in another post. Okay I'm done now.

Minus the techno side of this, it's one of the most simple and beautiful tunes I've heard in a long, long time.

Christmas/New Years checklist.

1. Sort out bedroom. Both bedrooms.
2. Read novels for English class.
3. Find my cross necklace.
4. Meet Steph and the Vietnam group at the airport.
5. Spend Christmas Eve with Steph in Melbourne.
6. Learn the whole song of "Somebody's Baby" on guitar.
7. Learn the whole song of "How to save a life" on piano.
8. Find the right gifts for people.
9. Find time to spend with friends.
10. Spend Christmas with family.
11. Go shopping on Boxing Day.
12. Do the holiday homework... maybe.
13. Figure out plans for New Years.
14. Pack for LIT.
15. Love life whilst being at LIT.
16. Head from LIT to Summer Camp.
17. Love life whilst being at Summer Camp.
18. Leave from Summer Camp. Hate life again. No I'm kidding.
19. Be at/in the amazing 'Encounter' night.
20. Beach it as much as possible before school begins.

I said I needed room to breathe.
I said I needed to break free.
Well all that’s true.
Thought I was running from you...
Turns out I was running from me.

Something so honest, so beautiful, and so real.

The lyrics are in the post below.

Come home.

A burning inside starts to let go. Turns into smoke. Everyone knows it. A fire in your eyes starts to let go. It died long ago. Everyone knows it. The hope that we had, the dream that we were, home feels so far away. You were made for more than just pain.

Looking for reasons to try. A reason to live or to die. Won’t you come home? Back to where your heart is. If this is the meaning of life, every breath that we breathe is a fight. Won’t you come home? Back to where you started. Won’t you come home?

What once was a girl is now just a ghost. Is now just a ghost. And everyone knows it. Seen it before. We watched her explode. We watched her explode. But nobody shows it. Nothing hurts worse than hope that’s deferred. Don’t let this slip away. See you shining under the shame.

Looking for reasons to try. A reason to live or to die. Won’t you come home? Back to where your heart is. If this is the meaning of life, every breath that we breathe is a fight. Won’t you come home? Back to where you started.

Slipping away. Slipping away.

Looking for reasons to try. A reason to live or to die. Won’t you come home? Back to where your heart is. If this is the meaning of life, every breath that we breathe is a fight. Won’t you come home? Back to where your heart is.

Won’t you come home? Won’t you come home?

Running hard for the infinite.

I'll be waiting, anticipating, all that I aim for; what I was made for.
With every heartbeat, all of my blood bleeds, running inside me, looking for You...

I can feel you reaching.

Finally, it has been explained with words. Finally.

"This is why we sing. Singing allows us safe passage through the
treacherous waters of the soul. Our hopes and fears, our doubts and
our beliefs—these are frightening caves to explore, and even worse to
talk about. But in a song, all matter is fair game."
-Jon Foreman.

How does he do it? How does he find words from the English language and explain this kind of thing? He's talking about how we can sing about really risque topics in a song, and there is minimum controversy. It's fair game. If we were to talk about it, it would get so much hassle. But in a song, you can show others your own heart. In a song, if you can find the words, you are able to pull out a piece of you and give it breath, give it life, give it wings. I can't even begin to explain what singing and writing my own songs means to me, yet here it is, plain and simple words that say it all so perfectly. I didn't think I could be more inspired by Jon Foreman than I already am. Wow.

Small things.

My tummy keeps making gurgling noises.
I actually really love old-style movies like Pride and Prejudice, or North and South.
I really like swinging on my hammock because it for a second, it feels like I'm flying.
I still remember the day I learned how to tie my shoes. It was in a gym, watching my brother play basketball.
I've said this constantly, but it's true; my christmas tree looks like a Japanese robot that is capable of giving someone seizures. I don't like the LED lights on it.
My hair has always been the same. Always. No changes.
The letters on my bracelet from the Philippines that once spelled 'Pagudpud' now spells 'Padp'.
I just really, really like seashells. I'm not sure why, though. But I do.
I've never been given flowers before, but I'm sure I would love that. Flowers are pretty miraculous, when you really think about them.
My first big blanket had all the animals from Noah's ark on it and I loved it.
I really do doubt things too much.
I don't like the colour of my eyes - or lack thereof.
There is just something so good about perfumes and scents. I love smelling things. Things that smell good, obviously.
I don't seem to be wearing nearly as much jewelry as I used to. I never could go out the door without my rings and a necklace, yet that is an often occurrence now.
It's actually possible to move on from a bad past circumstance, and it's actually very possible to forgive. Like, it really is. If I were to be honest with myself, I never would have believed that were true, if it wasn't for the fact that it happened to me. I can remember, and not feel the pain. It's incredible.
My phone hasn't had credit since the 12th of July. Oops.
We bought a new set of dinner plates and bowls and cups and stuff. They are shiny and I like them.
I will admit it; I have a slight stereotypical-girly-celebrity-crush on Alex O'Loughlin. He's pretty, he's Australian, but that's about it. The crush stops there. It's nothing compared to my love for Heath Ledger. :P
And while I'm on that topic, I (Obviously, for those who even know the slightest bit about me) love Jon Foreman. But that's a different love entirely. He really is the biggest human inspiration in my life.
I really like using watercolour to paint with, because it does most of the work by itself. It creates its own beauty; I don't really have to do anything.
Forest Edge is my second home. Maybe my first, I'm not too sure. They're both about even.
I haven't sleepwalked in a long time. I think that's a good thing?
I really am proud to be Australian. I love this country.
I love walking into a library, and just looking at all the rows of books on the shelves. It's like seeing thousands of worlds lined up next to each other.
I wish Christy Miller and Todd Spencer weren't fictional characters.
Blink-182 sound like my childhood.
I still really do want to fly.

'Here', is pretty cool.

My first year of school. Me and my bright red trackies.

I went to my old primary school tonight, to watch a friend's younger brother perform in the Christmas concert. It was so strange to watch from the audience, instead of being on that stage. Especially when they sang "War is Over". It's sung every year, before I went to school there, during, and obviously after.
I remember clearly what it was like to be on that stage with my friends all around me, arms slung over each others' shoulders, swaying back and forth with the music. We'd hear the sound of a siren in the distance, which was Santa Claus in his firetruck. Don't ask why he was in a firetruck; to this day, I still don't know. But we'd hear the siren, and we'd sing as loud as we could out of pure joy and/or excitement.
When they sang the song tonight, they didn't have their arms over each others' shoulders, they didn't sway back and forth, they didn't have Santa come while the song was coming to an end.
But it was still the same song, it was still the same sound of kids' voices being high pitched and slightly out of tune, it was still the same gleam of joy in their eyes. Santa came after the song, by the way. With the siren.

The saddest part for me was realizing that none of these kids knew who I was. Maybe one did, and he was the prep when I was in grade 6. He was the star of the show tonight, the one the whole school looked up to. But it's a pretty sobering experience when you turn up at what you still consider your childhood home, to find it rearranged, to find that after this year there will only be one teacher left that you know, to find that none of the kids remember who you are. They remembered the girl who is in year 7. She was in grade 2 when I was the big kid.
Bloomin' time. Where did it all go?
Thankfully I could spend the rest of the night reminiscing with Ben. He was my grade, we were good friends. Between the two of us and two more, Justin and Steph, we pretty much ran the school.
It's crazy to see the baby of the school you could barely understand, be that leader now.
My old principal was more than right when he said it'd go fast.

OKAY. That's my spiel about the past in primary school.
When I look at the present, I think I'm happy. Perhaps that's because it's the Christmas holidays, perhaps not. But I am capable of doing nothing but reading my falling-to-pieces bible all day, and being fully content.
So I like living. It's a beautiful thing, it really is. I can be reminiscing all I want about what once was, but I'm not wishing I was back there. I can be missing those times, but I'm not wishing those times were these ones now. Those times are gone, and they're meant to be gone. I'm meant to be here now, so here I am.
And when I remember that here is where He is too, here is looking pretty darn good.
He's the one that placed me here, after all.

This isn't everything you are.

"And in one little moment, it all implodes.
This isn't everything you are.
Breathe deeply in the silence, no sudden moves.
This isn't everything you are.
Just take the hand that's offered, and hold on tight.
This isn't everything you are.
There's joy not far from here, right? I know there is.
This isn't everything you are."

We are rising?

Woke up extremely late with the bridge of a Switchfoot song in my head.
There should be no surprises there, right?

"...We will rise, like the tide
Like dead men, coming back to life
We are rising, rising..."

Actually kinda freaked me out. My dream was crazy, as per usual, but waking up with these words being yelled into my head while everything else is silent was like the icing on the crazy cake. It just topped it all off, making me feel slightly freaked out after waking up and not knowing what time it was.
Also, my dream was about dead people. It looked like one of those post-apocalyptic scenes, with the sun rising over some silvery city. Kind of like this image below.


So... it fits the lyrics pretty well. Which is even more freaky. It could have had some meaning to it though. Maybe it's talking about next year rising up. Or maybe something else in my life. I don't really know, but I know it meant something.
I guess I needed the 2:30pm sleep-in :P

The smaller version of me.

If I titled this 'do not read', you'd read it. Ironic.

Hmm... how to put my thoughts and/or feelings into words of the English language...
This is gonna be hard. But I'll try.
If you are reading this post, it will most definitely be totally vague and unspecified, and lacking a great deal of detail as to what it will say. I'm only really writing this down to highlight a moment in life when I feel like I have found out something that will soon become a pretty large, pretty real part of my life. It's not particularly something that I'd want to share with people via the internet. It's not something I'd want to share with people via any means of communication, right now, I suppose. So why write it here? How stupid, right?
Strangely enough, my blog has become my journal. I've tried to make do with the whole pen and paper thing, but it just doesn't stick all that well. I'm writing this post so I'll be able to look over it myself later on.
Okay, enough rambling, Cassie. Seriously.
The thought I would like to highlight right now, is that I feel as though I know something of my future. Something big, something wonderful, something crazy to know of now, which also makes it something scary. But I feel like I know it.
It's not ready for me now, at this stage in life. But it will be soon enough. And if I'm wrong, good for me. I want to write down that I have this thought now, so I can either look back and see if I was right, or if I was wrong. I wouldn't mind either, because whatever happens in my life, I know it was all planned to be that way, for the best.
I'm not kidding when I say thinking what I'm thinking is scary. It really, really is. It's honestly like seeing a part of your future that you know you're not ready for now, but maybe will be, some day soon. It's just a part of the whole "what to do with life" thoughts that run circles in everyone's minds at this age. So it's not some crazy thing like "I AM GOING TO BECOME SUPERHUMAN AND SAVE THE WORLD." Nope.
It's not a big "I WILL LIVE IN THIS PARTICULAR TOWN, STATE, COUNTRY, WITH 9 CHILDREN AND 23 CATS."
Nah.
It's something pretty small. Yet at the same time, pretty gosh darn big. But then again, what in life, isn't pretty gosh darn big?

To sum up the reason for this post, it's to mark a point in my life where I've had an idea come to me, concerning my future. It's just a little bit more light, that has been shed onto a little bit more of my path in life; that kind of thing. So if you're reading, it doesn't really hold anything of interest to you. It's just me rambling, but it's also a dot-point as to when I started having these ideas. So that's all. The end.

You've got wings, but you're scared to fly.

"Hey girl, be yourself now, don't believe what they told you to. Hey girl, be yourself now, your skin's more than a pinup suit. Hey girl, don't conform now, no one else got a soul like you. Hey girl, you're a strong one, but none of us are bulletproof. Deep down there's a hope inside, you've got wings but you're scared to fly... wake up, wake up... Keep looking for the blinding light, keep looking for the reason why, keep looking for the sun to shine, to take you higher and higher."

And she's somebody's baby still.

She yells, "if you were homeless, sure as hell you'd be drunk,
Or high or trying to get there, or begging for junk.
When people don't want you, they just throw you money for beer."

Her name was November, she went by Autumn or Fall.
It was seven long years since the Autumn, when all
Of her nightmares grew fingers and all of her dreams grew a tear.

She's somebody's baby, somebody's baby girl.
She's somebody's baby, somebody's baby girl,
And she's somebody's baby still.

She screams, "Well if you've never gone at it alone,
Well then go ahead, you better throw the first stone.
You got one lonely stoner, waiting to bring to her knees"

She dreams about heaven, remembering hell,
As a nightmare she visits, and knows all too well.
Every now and again, when she's sober, she brushes her teeth.

She's somebody's baby...


Today was her birthday, strangely enough,
When the cops found her body at the foot of the bluff.
The anonymous caller this morning tipped off the police.

They got her I.D from her dental remains,
The same fillings intact, the same nicotine stains.
The birth and the death were both over, with no one to grieve.

She's somebody's baby...

Xin Chau. ♥

I really miss her. I just counted on my fingers that there are 17 days until I get to see her again. I really really really reeeeeaaally cannot wait! Post cards may not be a big deal to you, whoever is reading this, but they are HUGE to me. To have your own name and address listed on a piece of card that will travel across the world with its mission to reach your hands... it makes me feel a little more important in the world. It crossed the oceans and crossed the world and made it to my hands, and to my heart. And it's the familiar handwriting I've grown up with, the way it's written is the same as every other letter or card I've gotten from her. And I love every little flow of the pen, every little dot point about what she's doing, every little smiley face to express how she's feeling and every little spelling mistake makes it even better. I love that she hopes I love the postcard. OF COURSE I DO. OH MY GOSH. How could I not?! I basically, once again, have been reminded of just how important she is.

"And no one needs to know how scared we are tonight..."

"We gotta live like we're dying."

One more added to the Summer soundtrack..

Weird.

Life, why are you so weird? You're just weird. It's weird. I don't know what else to say apart from that... which is weird. Did I just say weird? That's weird. Hmm. Weird, I know. But you know what's really weird? Walking. You use your left foot, you move it and position it with your leg, and then you use your right foot, and move and position that foot with your other leg... and then you just keep doing that in the same order, and you are in a completely different place when you stop. It's weird. They're just feet, but they've been on so many different surfaces, so many different kinds of land - dirt, grass, sand, concrete, gravel, bitumen, mud, rocks, you name it. And then there are the footprints left behind from other feet belonging to other people, those people, with their own stories of where they've been and what they've seen, and where their two feet have walked on this planet we call Earth. It's so weird.
And I'm rambling about feet, I know. But it's yet another example that shows we are all so connected in this world.
The other day I saw a photo of Jon Foreman performing on stage with Taylor Swift. And my thoughts were like this: "I've stood before, beside and behind Jon Foreman, I've held his hand, sang into his microphone, and have been slightly crushed by his weight. My friend Brittany just recently met Taylor swift, gave her a hug and spent a few hours to get to know her. And then Taylor Swift and Jon Foreman are on stage together, singing side by side. And then there's Brittany and I, who know each other well, who were once close friends, who would go everywhere together, hug, high five, walk side by side. And we're on the opposite sides of the world. And this is weird."

That's basically the sum of what happens in the whole world, with everyone knowing someone who knows someone who has met someone that the first person once knew. I know. But that's just one of the many quirks that make up who I am. And I am weird. But really, if we are all descendents from Abraham, since we are the lineage of Christ, then I know someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who knew someone who knew someone who etc.... I don't know, got to walk side by side with Jesus Christ in his human form. We're really all connected. Like our two feet. They may be totally separate parts of the body, but without the other one, we don't function properly. Our feet are still connected.
Feet are weird. This post is weird. I feel so weird. And I'm very tired. Rambling is pretty weird too. I don't know if this post has a purpose. But if you happen to find one, let me know.

Happy Little Things.

The following is a list of little moments I have either thoroughly enjoyed, have thoroughly learnt from, or am thoroughly excited about:

*Waving to my closest friend as she walked home from my house, knowing it would be the last time I saw her until Christmas Eve. It was like seeing someone go off to war, almost. But not in a miserable way, just that you knew something life-changing was going to happen to them. Not necessarily to the world, like the wars were, but to themselves, inside themselves.

*Suddenly becoming closer to friends I already had, and showing me the incredible people I've always known, but never really known. Spending heaps of time with these people has been a lot of fun.

*Not knowing which amazing book to choose from to read, both of which are inspiring just from the blurb on the back cover.

*Having a stripey blue and white hammock in my backyard.

*Falling more and more in love with my Saviour every single day.

*Seeing old friends again, even if for a moment. I still love them so much.

*Talking to friends on a regular basis, unfortunately until 4:30am on several accounts. But I am nocturnal, so most of the time, this is okay.

*Being able to stop and suddenly remember that this is Summer now.

*Having my beloved Vice Verses album played all the time, everywhere I go. Same goes for Xylo Myloto by Coldplay.

*Eating lots and lots and lots of mangoes.

*Realizing how fast my metabolism is, as the scales can go down two kilos just by not eating for a day. I'm not sure if this is a good thing, But it's amusing at the least.

*Being with the younger girls at Youth, and realizing how much I smile when I watch them do all the crazy things I did at their age.

*Participating in IGNITEyouth's Amazing Race, once again, and still loving it. And driving that ridiculous jeep thing through a course, trying not to hit the cones, with poor young children standing in the trailer on the back.

*Talking about Switchfoot and Jon Foreman in general with an old friend who I never see, who actually UNDERSTANDS. The only other person whose love for Switchfoot is close to being as large as mine.

*Rediscovering all the old songs from the 90's and early 00's with friends, and reminiscing on childhood memories that go with the songs.

*Finally, finally, being able to write a song and finish it. I have not been successful in doing that for such a long time, and suddenly the words are coming all over again.

*Being excited for the Community Fun Day tomorrow, being on the Compassion stand, meaning being able to help these kids who are in such desperate places in their lives.

*Being excited to just be a part of the church community I'm in, and being around all these beautiful souls.

*Being excited for the carols after the Fun Day, even if it means I get so much teasing from Russell because I'm Mary again this year, only with a different Joseph. It's actually a fair bit of fun being a mannequin and then coming to life.

*Driving myself to Seaspray beach with Vice Verses as the soundtrack.

*Seeing how long my hair suddenly is, and not knowing what to do with it now it's this long.

*Watching all the old videos my friends and I have recorded over the years and remembering everything like it was only a second ago when it happened.

*Listening to the best of Blink-182 and feeling like a little kid again.

*Suddenly having more inside-jokes about things, something I realized I hadn't had much of lately. I don't know why. But I like them.

*Hanging my head out the window on clear starry nights.

*Having insane dreams every single night. Every, single, night.

*Realizing that my fingernails are probably stronger than I am in general.

*Picking up my cat Kara, and noticing that even for an old, whinging cat, she's still SO CUTE. And also noticing that if she can be that playful and cute even when she's 10 years old, I can still be a child while I'm getting older.

*My seashell bracelet I got from Robe, South Australia.

*Wearing the most comfortable guy's sweatshirt to bed. Like now.

*Waking up in the morning, and suddenly smelling my own perfume still on my wrists. And it still smells really good. :P

*Having board games, card games, outdoor barbecues and good movies become a regular routine with friends I usually never get to see.

*Being excited to pick Steph up from the airport on Christmas Eve, seeing everyone who went to Vietnam, and looking at the Melbourne Christmas lights.

*Having the joy of the Lord in me so often for no reason, that it just makes me even more joyful.

*Having days where everything looks like Summer, sounds like Summer, tastes like Summer, smells like Summer, and feels, in every way, like Summer.

That's all I can think of, right now. But still, that's a pretty long list. Life is still wonderful. It always has been, it's just a matter of me noticing its wonderfulness. I would like to do that more often, please, Cassie.