i was not expecting this.

I just can't wait.

Those summer nights are coming.
You know the ones.
Clear, starry skies.

Crickets chirping.
A cool breeze blowing in the heat.
Friends close by.

Music wafting through the air.

Laughter escaping your mouth.
Carefree.
Happy.
Peaceful.
Content.
And just having freedom.

They're close by i can feel it.

Live Like we're Dying.

Sometimes we fall down, can't get back up.
We're hiding behind skin that's too tough.
How come we don't say I love you enough,
'Til it's too late, it's not too late.

Our hearts are hungry, for a food that won't come.
But we could make a feast from these crumbs.
And we're all staring down the barrel of a gun.
So if your life flashed before you, what do you wish you would've done?

We gotta start looking at the hands of the time we've been given here,
If this is all we got, then we gotta start thinkin' it.
Every second counts on a clock that's tickin'
Gotta live like we're dying.
We only got 86 400 seconds in a day
To turn it all around, or to throw it all away.
We gotta tell 'em that we love 'em while we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we're dying.

And if your plane fell out of the skies,
Who would you call with your last goodbyes?
Should be so careful who we left out of our lives,
So when we long for absolution, there'll be no one on the line.

You never know a good thing 'til it's gone,
You never see a crash 'til it's head on.
Are all these people right, when we're dead wrong?
We never know a good thing 'til it's gone.

What are we doing?

our human bodies are merely vessels.
Who cares what shape, size or colour.
Variety, difference, individuality. It's beautiful.

It meant we can carry different talents, different life stories, different ideas and inventions and gifts and skills.

And when we come together, we can pour out our gifts and use them to help each other, and the whole world.
And what are we even doing?
We have forgotten the meaning of living.
Ask yourself, what do you believe it is?
Or are you afraid to think that thought?
Ask yourself again.
Don't let yourself answer straight away.
But listen to the deepest part of your heart, and you will know.

thinking of running, far far away.

Begin to Listen.

Caught up in living,
Getting through each day.
When all the tomorrows become faded yesterdays,
Are you slipping away?

Help me turn down the world tonight,
Take a quiet moment, somewhere we can unwind.
Losing touch, we forget to take time
To share what's in our hearts,
Speak what's on our minds.
In the silence,
Hear your heart beat next to mine.

Different.

My plan is to not conform.
To not fit in.
To break down all the expectations and high standards set for me.
I don't need anyone telling me how to be.
My plan is to surprise everyone.
To be different.
To be someone who can't be put in a group, who can't be labeled with stereotypical jargon.
I am not normal.
So never assume anything of me.
Otherwise you will probably be disappointed.
I don't fall into routine.
I don't fall into management of any kind.
I am messy.
disruptive.
annoying.
loud, and sometimes quiet.
odd.
confusing.
a fantasizer.
mostly optimistic.
spontaneous.
creative.
a deep thinker.
indecisive.
ridiculous.
possibly dangerous.
frustrating.
rebellious.
unsure.
hypocritical.
a dreamer.
crazy.
weird.
out of control.
I am different.

You hold
The universe

You hold

Everyone on Earth

And All i need is You.

Yes.

No.

This is a new feeling and i don't know whether i like it or not just yet.
But i think i may be leaning towards the first option. Maybe.

This world is ridiculously unbalanced, ridiculously unmotivated, and ridiculously nonsensical.
And although there have been many people who have realized this, nothing every truly seems to change.
Or perhaps it does, but it never seems to be permanent.
This world is getting worse and worse.
All anyone EVER cares about is money. Sure people have passions and ambitions and aspire to be someone and do something they love. But look at us - our fuses are short, and getting shorter.
I don't belong here at all.
I just want out.

because it's you.

i will stay here with you
and watch the world go by.

in this moment with you,
for the rest of time.

all my life here with you
means more to me than anything.

wasting time spent on you
is everything.

i will wait
until we pass through
the door that leads me home.

i will stay
by you forever,
our love has made us one.

I'm passing time,
with you my love.

I will spend my life
on you, with you.

Pouring out
my love for you
and only you.

I will give it all,
just to be with you.

Because it's you.

I will never conform.

You are.

I will get straight to the point on this one:

I totally and completely, fully, wholeheartedly believe that Jesus Christ is Lord.

Jesus,

I may never be able to describe just what you have done for me, not to you, not to anyone else, not myself.

I don't think there are such words in existance that would accomplish such a task.

I know about science, about theories, figures, statistics, apparent facts and apparent evidence that disagree with who you are.

But what i know even more is what i know in my heart.

You are like the wind.

We cannot see you with our physical eyes, but we know you are real because if we just look around, we can see your miracles taking place every second right in front of us.

Wind is invisible, but it moves the visible things very clearly, just like you do.

I don't know how to explain who you are or what you are and i don't know how to answer all the questions.

But i do know that you are just,

definitely, totally, completely, truly real.

Life is not by chance.

I myself don't believe in karma,

or cults,

or religions,

and many other things.

I don't ever wish to intrude upon others beliefs.

I am just saying what i believe.

And Jesus i can feel you in my heart right now, more than these keys under my fingers.

I so love you.

And I so wish the whole world could know the love i have found in you, like i do right now.

"Do you know how fast you were going?"

Time is fleeting.
I am running out of that stupid crap that keeps track of life.
It just keeps disappearing, it's frustrating me.
I'm frustrated that i have too much to do.
I'm frustrated that everything always happens at once.
Life is speeding fast away, and I'm barely hanging on at the moment.

I don't want to grow older. I don't want to think of the present time as the future's past.
People are coming, people are going.
I don't want Meggie to move. It will suck.
The year is ending, a new year is coming.
I know the future holds much potential.
But I'm just not done with 2010 yet.

I don't have time to think about what will happen tomorrow.
I'm still working on yesterday lol.
Please just slow down for a little bit?
I suggest a Pitt stop, I need to unwind.
Otherwise,
Pretty soon I'll be about to crash.

The Last Shall Be First

Come, tell me your trouble

I'm not your answer

But i'm a listening ear.

Reality has left you reeling

All facts and no feeling

No faith and all fear

I don't know why a good man will fall

While a wicked one stands

And our lives blow about

Like flags on the land

Who's at fault is not important

Good intentions lie dormant

And we are all to blame

While apathy acts like an ally

My enemy and i are one and the same

I don't know why the innocent fall

While the monsters still stand

And our lives blow about

Like flags on the land

I don't know why our words are so proud

Yet their promise soothing

And our lives blow about

Like flags in the wind

Oh you who mourn will be comforted

You who hunger will hunger no more

All the last shall be first

Of this I am sure

You who weep now will laugh again

All you lonely be lonely no more

Yes, the last will be first

Of this I am sure.

I don't know why the innocent fall

Or why the little ones thirst

But i know the last shall be first.

The last shall be first.

sometimes i just need to be alone.
sometimes i just need to hear silence and see darkness and feel nothing.
it's not necessarily a bad thing. It's more like an escape from bad things.
sometimes, it's just that i need to be forgotten.

The hope of all the Earth.

Far
beyond
what
i
can
see
or
comprehend

You
Are
Etching
your
eternity
in
me.